Birthday Month Day 9

Anytime a person attempts to do something great, there are critics waiting to, you know, criticize.

As I approach being one third of the way through my month-long celebration, the critics have been giving their opinions. They have much to say about my efforts to enjoy myself. Comments range from “this is a ridiculous and childish idea” to “what makes you think you deserve this”.

photo credit: anthom

My critics have really been going after me this month. They haven’t been holding back at all as they are judging every aspect of my life.

I decided enough was enough. It was time to confront them.

I invited them to join me for dinner. We sat outside on a sunny evening having a glass of wine and bread with various cheese and hummus spreads. We chatted for about an hour and got to the bottom of this recent invasion.

You may already be able to sense the source of these attacks, I should have seen it coming. It was simply my unhealthy desire to be accepted. Over the past month I’ve opened myself up to new work opportunities, new relationships, more honesty and more writing. That’s a lot of new exposure for one girl.

Today’s birthday celebration was spent alone wrestling with these issues of insecurity and the need for acceptance that I often let get out of control. I celebrate this because I didn’t give up, and by the end of my dinner I had won this battle.